Tuesday, September 1, 2009

September 1st

I'm beginning to think that Tuesdays are just not good days for me. I'm not quite sure why as they're not awfully long days with my dad ... but I spent a great deal of today crying and it's not the first Tuesday where I've found myself in a funk.

I finished The Notebook today ... so good and I knew how sad it was. I knew. Ugh, but the loss of his love, the fact she didn't want to be taken - it just got to me. It just squeezed my whole heart and made me dread what's to come with my dad. Alzheimer's and FTD, very different ... but still very much the same thing too with certain aspects.

Aside from that, some songs came on my iPod that remind me of things and the book I finally decided to cave in on and buy wasn't at the store when I went. In fact, neither was the other random book I'd read about online and wanted to read. That upset me as well. Oh well, it kind of made me think that maybe instead of reading about characters I can't get enough of that maybe I should make up some of my own and write more than I'm reading now.

We'll see. I keep saying that.